I'm still trying to find the perfect medium. I'm conflicted. I'm from the Leo and Diane Dillon school of thought... the story determines everything. The words (voice), the marks and medium of the illustration, style. Personally, being slightly schizophrenic I can work in all those voices and images. But the way the business works, the powers that be would rather have you do ONE thing and well, for selling purposes. I do understand it, but my brain does not work this way. I've found that what happens when I try to "fit" myself into other's molds I fall apart and just can't do it. So instead of doing what I know everyone wants all the time, I will do what I can for them, but do it mostly for me and see how things fall. If nothing else, that has been one of the biggest lessons of my life, from some truly great inspirations (Ieuan Rees, Bonnie Spiegel, Peter Halliday, Fritz Scholder, Chip Chadbourne, the list is long and I'm blessed to have known and to have studied with some of them)-- BE TRUE TO YOUR OWN VOICE AND GIFTS. LISTEN TO YOUR INNER SELF.

So I will set up a website and try do to do the mailings. That is what it's called for, and I've not done it. But I must create the things, pieces, books that speak to me. Even though it might originally look as if I'm too far-flung, I do know there is a connectedness and it is ME, so I will simply throw myself into my work and hope there's someone(s) that "get" me. Because what I've been doing, hasn't been working.

At present I'm working on my portfolio and a few short writing pieces (a tutorial for www.Yellapalooza.com the second part to The Blanking Page: Turning a New Leaf, and a poem, Terrible Terrance Terrapin) I have to rewrite one picture book and redo the illustrations (not as much work as the rewrite) Nana's Gift, finish Whateverafter. And Robert Oryem will be coming back from the Sudan the end of the month and we will begin in earnest a book of his story. All the while I wish to rebuild my portfolio, hopefully setting up a website and by the end of the summer, begin mailing. I hope this blog will chronicle not only my progress, but technique. It may or may not attract anyone (I hope it does, it would be nice to have the feedback). But it's not why I do it.

This helps to hold me accountable to my dreams and aspirations. It gives me the opportunity to think out loud. And keep me on track. I will post two more posts today (computer providing, it's being a bit of poopyhead). One will be a work in progress. The other was going to illustrate the tutorial, but I will redo it instead as portfolio piece.